Speed Dating Events

People keep asking me if I’ll marry again. It’s as if after you’ve had one car crash you want another.

Never get into a narrow double bed with a wide single man.

When a man makes a woman his wife it’s the highest compliment he can pay her and it’s usually the last.

The only time a woman has a true orgasm is when she is shopping.

Remember men, we’re fighting for this woman’s honour; which is probably more than she ever did.

Being a woman is of interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.

A man is as old only as the woman he feels.

When he’s late for dinner, I know he’s either having an affair or is lying dead in the street. I always hope it’s the street.

I’ll believe it when girls of twenty with money marry paupers turned sixty.

It’s a pity that Marie Stopes’ mother had not thought of birth control.

Love. Everyone says that looks don’t matter, age doesn’t matter, money doesn’t matter. But I never met a girl yet who has fallen in love with an old ugly man who’s broke.

I’d much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, they can wear cute clothes — and they’re the first to be rescued off sinking ships.

I want a man who is kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a billionaire?

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