Speed Dating Events

Don’t call men,except occasionally to return their calls. When a boyfriend calls you, don’t stay on the phone for more than ten minutes. Buy a timer if you have to. When the bell rings, you have to go! That way you seem busy and you won’t give away too much about yourself or your plans (even if you don’t have any plans). By ending the conversation first, you leave them wanting more. Good conversation enders are: “I have a million things to do,” “Well, it’s been really nice talking to you,” “Actually, I’m kind of busy right now,” and “My beeper’s beeping, got to run!” Remember to say these things in a very nice way. Read the rest of this entry »

Why take a chance?

Invariably, when you call him, he will get off the phone first or quickly and you might misinterpret his busyness as disinterest. You may even think that he’s with another woman! Understandably, you feel empty and nervous for the rest of the day or evening or until you hear from him again. This nervousness might make you call him again to ask, “Is everything okay?” or “Do you still love me? miss me?” And, you end up breaking more rules!

So, if you don’t want a man to know how much you like him, or that you feel empty and insecure, don’t call him. If he leaves a message on your machine to return his call, try not to. Only call him back right away if it’s a scheduling change regarding an upcoming date or event, not just to chat. Read the rest of this entry »

Oh maiden, let your distaff be,

And pace the flowery meads with me, And 1 will tell you lies . . .

Oh follow me where love is flown, Into the leafy woods alone,

And I will work you ill.

Once upon time, long ago and far away, men didn’t just up and out with it. They expected to have to court the chosen lady, to flatter, to persuade, to beat down a real resistance. They had to stoke up the fires of passion if they hoped to build up a head of steam. Read the rest of this entry »

Well, only some marriages are made in heaven. The others need a fair bit of terrestrial stage management to get them off the ground. This is the story of Maggie and Willie in an evergreen drama, Hobson’s Choice. Maggie, at thirty, is the unmarried daughter of the bootmaker Henry Hobson. She has been working like a dog for her father all her life, and her prospects are getting dimmer rather than brighter.

Maggie develops a fellow-feeling for Willie, her father’s downtrodden labourer, who is nevertheless ‘a genius at making boots’. She forms a plan in her mind — but then she has to break it to Willie: Read the rest of this entry »

MY DEAR MADAM,

. . . Is it most expedient for a man to make avowal of his attachment to a lady ‘viva voce’ (`anglice’ in ate a ate) or by epistolary correspondence?

This preface explains the motive of my now addressing you. It will save me the necessity of a more explicit avowal, and declare to you that my future happiness on earth is at your disposal . . .

And so on, for pages and pages of pompous and prosaic guff. Mr Trollope, like Mr Collins, claims to despise those who ‘contract alliances upon motives of a pecuniary nature’, yet his letter goes into both his financial situation and hers in minute detail. Finally he winds up on a note of unconcious irony: Read the rest of this entry »

Yonder a maid and her wight

Go whispering by,

War’s annals will fade into night

Ere their story die.

It is LOVELY WHEN DUKES FIND their Duchesses. Or any kind of lord or lordling, baron or baronet. But making a magic proposal is not the monopoly of a titled or educated man. The wonders of falling in love and wanting to marry are available to all comers, high and low alike. It’s a real- life drama of dreams come true for every new couple. Read the rest of this entry »